Thursday, May 6, 2010

Mommy needs a time out!

Are we even allowed to take those?

Sometimes I feel like the stress of 3 kids, house, full time job, and husband are to much to bare. I tend to let the little things flip me over the border of rational to not so rational in a matter of seconds! So I have decided that when I act like my kids and have a temper tantrum (which I do rather well if I do say so myself) I need to put myself in "time out".

As a mother/wife are we allowed to take ourselves out of a situation and have a time out? I find that if I can walk away from a situation a breathe I can sometimes handle the situation better. I just need to negotiate the terms of my time out I think a glass of wine while sitting there would be pure torture! But a necessary punishment!

Okay, being serious now. Can we as parents do this? Would our children learn more self control by mimicking our behaviors if they see us removing ourselves from a situation that could escalate into a free for all word throwing rampage! I believe that teaching the children to walk away and collect their thoughts inside their head and have a more calm approach to the situation. I know when I get super angry I tend to say things I don't mean (only to my husband of course) if I get a time out...that wont happen!

I guess we will just have to see if this works and I an ashamed to say...I hope I get time outs alot...because I could totally use a break!

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Another Happy Birthday Birth Story!

Today is my middle child's 8th Birthday! Anyone who knows me (which most of my readers don't) knows that Shailyn was the labor of all labors...I SERIOUSLY think she wanted to kill me from the inside out! A quick back story...I was in a car accident at 15wks with Shay, 9 weeks later I had a whole day with no movement...I went to the hospital..they find her heartbeat (thank god) but hook me up for a bit to monitor her only to find I was contracting...this started a long stint of pre term labor and many weeks of BED REST! At 32 weeks I had just a normal day of preterm contractions and irritability only to find by night time it was worse...I went to the hospital I was contracting 2-3 minutes and they managed to stop it with the Trabutiline shots in my arms....The next morning I went down for a sono to make sure she was ok...I started contracting every 2 minutes....get back to my room...I WAS DIALATED...cervical change at 32 weeks not good....2 days hospitalized on magnesium sulfate....BLOWS...But no baby so that was a BIGGER BLESSING! at 37 weeks...they took me off all medications and said....have at it....have your baby when you want!

May 3, 2002- I had lost my mucus plug 2 days earlier and the doctor said...24-48hrs till I could possibly go into labor and I was already 3cm dialated. Well all day I had this horrible pressure feeling. It was almost like there was something in there...she had descended to the birth canal is all it was. Well Brian and I were suppose to go pick up a pool table in LaPlata which is a hour away and it was the weekend after the horrible F5 Tornado had ripped through the small town and I wasn't necessarily ready to see my hometown torn to shreds plus I was scared to go that far away from the hospital! I decided to stay with my mom and go shopping 5 minutes from the hospital. We went to the furniture store and I kept telling her I thought my water was going to break my pressure was getting worse...she said "DO NOT SIT ON ANYTHING"...real nice huh? Well nothing happened....We went home and then met up with Brian and my step dad at my house later....I looked at my mom and said you better go home and get some sleep I will be calling you later!! She said okay we will see!

Brian and I finally got to bed about 11....I looked at him and said "I think I am going to go into labor! Wanna get the ball rolling seeing as it will be six better take it now why you can get it!" well bow chicka wow wow.....

A fell asleep around 12..

1:52am.....I sat straight up in bed with that Oh My GOD breathe breathe breathe....
swatting at Brian....Ummmmmmmmmm Holy Shit.......Fuck me Fuck me Fuck worked and ummmmmmmmm......this is not good!!!

Brian wakes up and see's I am in PAIN.... he kinda freaks....2 minutes later....HOLY FUCK! here comes another one....OMG OMG OMG I hit my knees laying my head on the bed, breathe breathe breathe.....

It passes....I look at Brian...WE NEED TO GO! Like an hour ago...maybe doing that was not such a good idea! this is WAY different then with Bri....I am I was at 8cm with Bri.....We NEED TO GO! He calls his parents and tells them we are on our way to drop off Bri and head to the hospital!

We get in the car to go to the in laws and thankfully just down the street in the neighborhood because I didn't even put Bri in her car seat I put her on my lap to lesson the time...We arrive at his parents and for some strange reason I thought it would be okay to carry Bri into the house...Apparently Labor not the common sense part of the brain...Half way up the sidewalk....I get another contraction...this one worse than before...My knees buckle and Brians dad walks out...I am yelling.......I AM GOING DOWN OMG GRAB BRI GRAB BRI.....He runs grabs her right before I hit the ground here I am on all fours rocking and breathing through the contraction right on the sidewalk in front of his house...NICE!

We leave quickly because I honestly thought she was going to come out in the car I laid on my side grabbing Brians arm with EVERY painful contraction that was hitting me every 2 minutes! I cried (which I did not once with Bri all natural) the pain was way different and much more worse than I remembered with Bri...we get to the hospital and I couldn't even walk to L&D...I needed a stupid wheelchair....

We arrive in Labor and Delivery about 4am....getting out of the house was longer than I wrote....I had to work through ALOT of contractions at home...They check me and the nurse says ok honey your about 3-4cm....I looked at her and I said WHAT?!?!?!? She said yeah your probably not going anywhere but its gonna be a while....DUMB BITCH was all I could think...she is lying to me....this pain is crazy...

I got up out of the bed because I don't labor well laying down in a bed..I like to be up and walking and moving plus my BACK was KILLING ME! Little did I know Shay was turned wrong...

I needed to go to the bathroom and the nurse walked in to get some more information and I was in the bathroom...I sat down and the all you heard was the sound of me peeing...but....I wasn't peeing....I yelled out to the nurse...Ummmmmmm My water just broke....she said....Are you sure? Yes....cant your hear it I cant pee that long......she says well you are staying....that was 5:15am....and my pain got even more worse than it was!

I am laboring pretty good at this point the pain is still horrific...I felt like I needed brian to punch my tail bone....I kept leaning over the bed asking Brian to take his fist and PUSH really hard on my tail bone and lower back...that seemed to be the only thing that helped my pain! He was scared to push...I was at this point losing my patience with him and I asked him again....PUSH HARDER BRIAN JESUS...Then I got frustrated and said Fuck it! I will labor on my own. A few minutes later I am dying literally or so I felt anyways and I look over at Brian and he would never believe.....SLEEEEEEEEPING! I LOST IT! I yelled at him.....Brian what do you think you are doing? He said What? and then the words you NEVER say to a women in labor......I AM TIRED!!!...Those were words for murder! Seriously! If I didn't need the fluids I would have wrapped my IV tube around his neck and choked the life out of him! If looks could have killed,....he would have been dead! I looked at him and I said (very nasty) How the FUCK do you think I feel!!" This was not a good situation thank GOD my doctor walked in....I was crying....losing my focus because Brian was pissing me off I couldn't manage my pain and this...totally sucked!

its now 6:30am and my doctor decided he would check me to see if I was making any progress....He checks and I was ONLY this point I LOST IT! My doctor GOD LOVE HIM....sat down on my bed as I was sobbing uncontrollably because the pain was more intense than I had experienced before..he took my hand..looked me in my eyes and said "Shannon, I think over the course of the last 16 weeks we have developed a relationship...more so than just doctor/patient...I would like to consider myself your friend, and as your friend I CANT STAND to see you in this much pain, I know you are a all natural no pain medication person but I cant stand to see you like this and technically Can you do this for another 5 minutes?" through my crying I said no I cant but if I get the epidural I am SUCH A FAILURE! I looked at Brian because he knows my belief and he put his hands up and said "Oh hell no I am out of this because I am not going to make that decision, it is for you to make..I will not be blamed either way" I looked at my doctor and I mummered ok...I will do it!

He leaves the room only to return and say "We have a problem" The anesthesiologist is in Hughesville and it will take him about 20 minutes" I said Ummmm NO I want this epidural and I want it NOW...I had already let myself believe that I was going to have some relief what else can I do? Can I get in the shower I heard that helps with back labor? He said "Go for it!"

Brian helped my up and helped my into the shower. Something changed in me chanded when I got up...Once again little did I know Shay Flipped to face down position....

I am sitting in the shower and I put my head back on the wall and was taking in the calming feeling of the shower. Then all of a sudden out of NOWHERE I felt the urge to push....I was JUST told I was 5cm....there was no way I was ready to have her...But I really felt like I needed to just bare moms know that I have to take a shit feeling...Brian looked at me and he said...Are you pushing? (grunting) NO, Yes you are what are you doing? Brian shut up I just feel like I need to push a little! He said..GET OUT OF THE SHOWER SHANNON this isn't funny. I looked at him and I said (grunting again..another contraction) Brian SHUT UP....about that time the floor of the shower filled up with blood Brian Freaked and said Ok you are getting out.....get out NOW!!!

Apparently my doctor could hear all of this and he looked at the nurse and said, "we are going to have a baby by shift change (7am) the nurse said you just checked her and she was 5 NO WAY I don't believe you...he replied "Listen to her...when she is talking and crying she is grunting....listen...."

Meanwhile, I am climbing out of the shower when I get hit with a big wave of PAIN..I buried my face in Brians chest grabbing skin in my clutches (which is painful for Brian but honestly the tittie twisting feeling was nothing on the crotch burning I was feeling) I started this yelling type moaning thing not screaming just more like a roar into Brians chest...Shay was right on the verge of coming out...I was at this point standing so the gravity pull was fueling the pain. It passes I walk to the bed and the nurse is standing there she says "I need to explain the risks of an epidural" I looked at her and in my pain I said.....You can tell me I will FUCKING DIE and I will sign that paper! When is the doctor going to get here...I cant take this anymore....(ha ha ha to me) I signed the paper and it looked like a ghost because I was shaking UNCONTROLLABLY (Transitioning anyone)

I sat down on the bed and I looked at the nurse and all I could yell was "OMG....I CANT GET THE EPIDURAL!!!!!!!" She said Why? I said SHE IS COMING NOOOOOOOW!! I had done this before so I knew what to do I grabbed my legs pulled those jokers back and I PUSHED like I had never pushed before....The nurse lifted my gown and started YELLING STOP STOP STOP STOP....DON'T PUSH SHE IS CROWNING...STOP STOP STOP....DR SBROCCO....GET IN HERE NOW!!!!!
She put her hands over me....that was not a good idea....I looked at her and I said...(God I am bitch)...IF YOU DON'T GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS FROM OFF MY CROTCH I AM GOING TO KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING FACE!!!!!! She had her hand on me HOLDING Shay in....REALLY??? Has anyone else given birth Naturally?? You know you CANNOT control that urge to PUSH..and this bitch is HOLDING HER IN!!! She told me to blow...Again...Natural...this DOES NOT WORK on someone who had already lost all control over her emotions and focus..

The doctor comes in..I said TELL HER TO GET OFF ME OR I AM GOING TO PHYSICALLY HURT HER...Dr Sbrocce (god love him again) said Shannon calm down breath I need to get set up...Just blow blow blow and I will go as fast as I can...Meanwhile....I am on FIRE....Again, with the all natural child birth....the ring of fire is NO joke!!! Your stuff is on FIRE LITERALLY and the nurse is holding Shay's head right at the point of FIRE...I could feel my self almost to the point of tearing..but not tearing...PAIN PAIN PAIN PAIN....I looked at my doctor and cried out...PLEASE YOUR GONNA KILL ME...I NEED TO GET HER OUT!!!! YOU KNOW I DON'T HAVE ANYTHING..JUST GET HER OUT!!!! He said okay let me get my gloves on...That was all I gave him..his gloves....and I pushed....

At 6:52am 22minutes past being told I had 5 hours to go and was only 5 cm dilated my baby girl entered this world in all her beauty and calmness (she wasn't breathing) The next few minutes are a blur....I was EXHAUSTED and TRAUMATIZED by this fast delivery..I laid there...almost passing out vaguely remembering saying...Why isn't she crying? Is she ok? Finally after a few minutes (thank god for shift change she had about 7 nurses working on her) she cried! Her apgars we low but she finally let out her big huge cry and all I could do was cry! They wrapped her up and Oh my was she tiny...but the most Beautiful thing I had ever SEEN! All 6lb 15oz of her!

Today 8 yrs later Shailyn Alicia is the most vivacious child...who loves everyone, the most caring child I have, and absolutely beautiful inside and out! Happy Birthday Shailyn! I would do you birth a million times over...just to make sure I had you in my life every day!




Monday, May 3, 2010

10 Things I learned camping in the backyard with my kids...

So Saturday Brian and I decided that we would have a free mini vacation right in out own backyard! We had it all...Blankets, Tent, Books, Lantern and SMORES! While we were laying down and it was dark was when the real fun began...

10. Nic can speak frog! The bullfrogs were on a rampage and Nic so nice wanted them to be quiet and said he could tell them to be quiet...Goes to the screen and says....Ribibibibibib It.....(pause) the frogs still croaking......They cant hear me through the screen!

9. Mommy did you know that spider monkeys can shoot webs from their mouth.....Ummmmm Nope sure didn't but I do now!

8. Daddy our Guinea Pig is pregnant....Oh yeah how do you know? She has nipples....and babies come from nipples....(ummmmmm?????)

This opened a can of worms...

7. Mommy did you know that when Tigers have babies....they come out of their butt and hang from umbilical cords...(Me) I don't think they come out of the butt?? Yes they do I saw it on Animal Channel and it was definitely from the butt what else is under the tail?...


6. The big dipper is not as easy to explain as most people think.

5. Nic is a monster to sleep beside...I think I lost more than one handful of hair!

4. The sounds that you hear in your backyard can lead your imagination to a whole new world that can actually freak you out a bit!

3. My kids know all the words by heart to the Phineaus and Ferb disney cartoon theme song..(that was my lullaby)

2. Even though it seems like a good idea to leave the rain cover off so you can stare up at th stars through screened in roof of the tent....When it rains at 5:30am.....It really wasn't such a good idea!

and the most fascinating.....

1. I love my family so much! They are my heart and soul and the only reason why I breathe...You don't have to spend any money just pitch and tent in the back yard and let the good times and laughter roll!! L.O.V.E = T.I.M.E not money!